Competition

Ran 7 easy miles this morning. There are some days I want to go out and hit it hard, and other days where a leisurely pace suits me. This morning was one of those days. Instead of concentrating on my pace today, I concentrated on me. I spent those 7 miles in truly reflecting on personal growth. I read an article the other day about how running can be addictive for some people, which can be destructive for them, and I got to wondering if running could be a negative influence in my own life. Running feeds into my competitive nature. I can compete with each previous training time to get a little faster. I can compete with other runners on their pace times, and definitely am competing with other runners when I race. Yesterday I was behind another runner going uphill and I ran that much faster just to see if I could pass him. I even told my husband my goal was to one day beat his half marathon time. Now I thought I was merely setting a goal, and that by making his PB my goal that he would feel flattered. I knew how hard he worked to get there and I wanted to try and get there too. But the problem with competition is that someone has to lose. And in marriage, we are partners, teammates, and best friends. And so in effect I was telling my best friend I wanted him to lose instead of portraying to him how much I admired his achievement. We all have encountered those people in our lives that compete with us on every level, the ones who have to try and one up us at every turn. People who somehow become an amplified shadow of yourself. And those people annoy me to no end. And then I turned around and became one of them.
So how do I keep running and not let my competitive nature be destructive ? I keep it in check, and make sure that my teammate, partner and best friend knows that I don't want him to lose. I stop trying to best his record, and set my own goals based on what I can do. I let him know that I do admire his achievement, and I'm going to work hard to make my own achievement without comparison to his. I start competing with myself and stop competing against other.